A Dash of Absurdity

pheuthe:

but coldflash Kingsman!AU where Joe doesn’t miraculously have enough money for a big house and putting two kids through college

so Barry gets a bit caught up in shady business, although Joe is trying to keep both Iris and Barry away from the worst of it. And one day Barry gets caught. He knows that he could turn to Joe for help, but it would cost the Wests way too much and Barry has been enough of a burden already. He fishes out the pendant he got right after his parents died in that car accident: he still remembers a man in a suit, telling Joe that it would be best if Joe could take care of the kid. Barry was eleven then, and way too observant for his own good, but he didn’t know what it all meant, or why Joe got so mad.

He still doesn’t know - but he remembers picking up the pendant that Joe has thrown away, wondering if maybe, one day, it will help.

There’s a number on the back, 18.03.00, and Barry doesn’t expect much, listening to the dial tone and tapping his foot against the dirty floor. But he certainly expects more than a robotic voice announcing he’s just dialed customer service. He tries to explain himself, states his name and that he’s currently at a police station, that he needs help-

“We hope that we have not lost you as a loyal customer,” the voice says, dismissively, and Barry panics, gripping the phone tight.

“Wait, wait, wait! Uh… I…. oxfords, not brogues?”

He doesn’t have a single clue what it might mean, but he remembers that phrase from the day when the man in the suit came and told him that his parents were dead. There’s silence on the other end of the line, and then the mechanical voice is thanking him again and Barry thinks ‘this is it, I’m completely fucked now’. 

Except ten minutes later, he’s released without as much as another word, and when he steps into the late afternoon sun, he nearly stumbles on the stairs as a voice calls out to him.

“Barry. My, my, look at you, all grown up. Need a ride home?”

And it’s the man in the suit, maybe a little bit more gray around his temples than he was ten years ago, but it’s him, with that smirk, with those intense eyes boring into Barry like he can read all the secrets with a single glance. He’s handsome, but he most certainly isn’t nice, and an alarm bell goes off in the back of Barry’s mind. But for some reason, despite this guy screaming ‘danger’, there’s just something about him that keeps Barry in place, watching and waiting.

“Who the hell are you?” he challenges, and the man’s smirk never even wavers. 

“I gave you that,” he gestures towards Barry’s neck, where the pendant is still hanging out in the open. Barry stuffs it hastily back under his shirt and scowls:

“That’s not really an answer.”

The man pushes away from the wall, all long lines and controlled power in his ever move, and tilts his head like he’s amused and wondering what new trick Barry will do next.

“My name is Leonard Snart, and your mother saved my life. Why don’t you let me drive you home and I’ll tell you about it?”

Originally posted by dailyhappylife